The basic premise of “How To Become a Total Failure” rests in the idea that true transformation of behavior comes from what each of us experiences and some of our best experiences are our failures. With this in mind, we set out to write a book that prompts readers to think of their own mistakes and the lessons they learned.
Each rule we selected follow a pattern. The pattern is that the rule appears to be a rule for success in the short-run, but in the long-run is usually a rule for failure. The rules are:
Rule #1: Resist learning anything new that could lead to more
responsibility — The more you learn, the more people will expect.
Rule #2: Don’t share what you know with others — Knowledge is power; don’t give away your power.
Rule #3: Be a jerk! — Jerks get what they want because decent
behaviors are not expected.
Rule #4: Always look out for Number One — It’s a zero-sum game.
Rule #5: It’s all about the money — Money equals success.
Rule #6: Promise things you have no intention of doing —The more you promise, the more responsible you look.
Rule #7: It’s always someone else’s fault —Success is dependent on your ability to CYA!
Rule #8: Truth is in the mind of the beholder —The truth is what benefi ts you most.
Rule #9: Do the least that’s necessary for success —Be all you can be but do as little as possible.
Rule #10: The customer is someone you have to put up with — Customers are never satisfied no matter what you do.
18 responses so far ↓
1 Study: False statements preceded war // Jan 25, 2008 at 10:44 am
[…] XHTML ← The Rules for Failure […]
2 From Barack Obama’s Memoir // Jan 29, 2008 at 10:46 pm
[…] of the rules for failure is to always look out for number one. I recently read Barack Obama’s autobiography titled Dreams From My Father. As I was quietly […]
3 Nate // Jan 31, 2008 at 5:11 pm
<p>I like what Vince had to say. “It’s all about the money” Becasuse at the end of the day when it’s all said and done it is…</p>
4 Why can’t the customer get his document in color? // Feb 1, 2008 at 7:59 pm
[…] #10 states: The customer is someone you have to put up with — Customers are never satisfied no matter what you… A recent ad on TV is a prime example of this rule. In the ad, a customer walks up to the front […]
5 Steroids and Sport // Feb 3, 2008 at 11:58 pm
[…] And then there’s the whole finger-pointing routine that goes on. Roger Clemens blamed his trainer and so did Barry Bonds. This fits nicely with rule #1 that says it’s always someone else’s fault. But I think, when you boil it all down, the rule that might apply best, assuming they really did take steroids, is rule #9, do the least that’s necessary for success. […]
6 Rule for success: look out for someone else? // Feb 9, 2008 at 7:21 pm
[…] Rule #4 says that one sure-fire way to fail in the long-term is to always look out for number one. I read a post about a Utah congressman, a republican, who gave up his chair for half an hour to a democrat. It’s good from time-to-time to see people following the Rules for Success rather than the rules for failure. Here’s the excerpt from the blog, http://blogs.sltrib.com/politics/ […]
7 10 things not to say at work // Feb 27, 2008 at 2:04 pm
[…] Bill found this article on NBC24.com by Arielle Berlin. Let’s see how these 10 things fit in with the 10 Rules for Failure. […]
8 All-You-Can-Eat Restaurant Overcharges for Eating Too Much // Mar 3, 2008 at 7:07 am
[…] Restaurant in Houma, Louisiana is a great example of two of the 10 rules for failure: Be a Jerk! and The Customer is Someone You Have to Put up […]
9 Ex-Advertising Entrepreneur Admits Business Mistakes // Mar 5, 2008 at 6:51 pm
[…] to his business mistakes. Let’s take a look at a few of those mistakes and see which of the 10 rules for failure Charles’s mistakes fit […]
10 Transforming Through Failure // Mar 12, 2008 at 7:48 pm
[…] take a look at a few of the businesses Business 2.0 featured for 2007, and then see which of the 10 rules for failure each mistake fits into, shall we? “During a routine service call in June, a Comcast cable […]
11 Philadelphia Cheesesteak Joint Requires Customers to “Speak English” // Mar 19, 2008 at 9:15 pm
[…] of the 10 rules for failure do you think this story fits into? Personally, I would categorize it with two of the rules for […]
12 Succeeding in Business With Proper SEO Skills // Mar 21, 2008 at 10:23 pm
[…] on succeeding in business. With that said, I’d like to categorize and explain a few of the rules for failure regarding SEO. This discussion should benefit those of you utilizing SEO on your website and/or […]
13 The New Capitalism - Collaboration // Mar 23, 2009 at 4:09 pm
[…] #2 of How to be a Total Failure advises us to not share what we know with others. As with all the rules for failure, this rule […]
14 Failing on American Idol // Apr 1, 2009 at 6:52 am
[…] raw talent and more about how they respond to failure. How willing they are to learn something new (Rule #1), to get out of their comfort zone and listen to criticism. I sense they are falling victim to Rule […]
15 Turning Failure Rules Inside-Out // May 8, 2009 at 10:36 am
[…] to make it happen we had to toss out these five failure rules: 1) Always look out for Number One (Rule #4); 2) Do the least that’s necessary for success (Rule #9); 3)Don’t share what you know […]
16 Prudential Weeps Over “Say On Pay” Passage // May 18, 2009 at 6:52 am
[…] rewards while at the same time losing $1.1 Billion dollars last year!How can that be justified (Rules #3, #4 & #5)? Are we so stupid that we would let this continue? God, I hope not. The term Robber […]
17 Let the Dead Bury the Dead // May 20, 2009 at 9:59 am
[…] to the bottom of this bizarre occurance, to find out why everyone seemed to be passing the buck (Rule #7). Finally, a emergency room doctor said that he did see the body and he would sign the death […]
18 Who Really Runs/Owns the Country? // May 27, 2009 at 6:35 am
[…] Recently he aired a side-by-side clip of President Barak now saying almost word-for-word the same things President Bush was saying about the Iraq war. Now that Obama is in the White House the tune he’s whistling sounds eerily similar to the past administration’s. I was sure this was going to happen. I was hoping I was wrong. I wanted the new President to fundementally change things, but he won’t, or he can’t (Rule #6). […]
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